Miss Him le :(

昨晚。。
我在钢琴室哪里，，
看见他。。
我好想他。。
好想抱他！
可是我不敢看着他。。
我很在意，
他昨天说过的东西，，
要回家前，
他和我谈天。。
可是我没什么说话。。
他问我会不会介意。一个星期没信息/
其实，，
我很在意。。
感觉上，好像分了手将！！
我不要那种感觉。。
我不要孤单一个人//
我不要没了他///
我不要他不再爱我了。。
我就是不要失去它。。
好爱他。。
到了晚上。。
突然电话响了。。
他打给我了。。
我已接电话。。
他就说他很想念我。。
其实，，
我很想和他说我爱他。。
还是没说了。。
说了可能他不相信我。。
昨晚，还谈得满开心的。。
也算是和好了。。
可是感觉怪怪的。。
我感觉到他爱我的程度，便少了。。
我便问他。。
你又感觉有点不爱我了吗？？
他回我说没有。。
还是一样爱。。
希望，如此吧。。
我不想再跟他吵架了。。
我真的不像没有了他。。
他是第一个男生。。令我将爱他。。
我也没试过将去爱一个人。。
从今天起。。
我应该要给他所要的吧？？

HERE COMES MY MOOD :(

Febuary 25th..
the day out of love..

是我的脾气吗??
还是我不够让他？？
正搞不懂。。
我不够认识他吗？？
还是我不够爱他？？
难道他感觉不到我的爱吗？？
怎么了？？
我哭了。。
我好想他，可是！！
他没信息我..
为什么他还是不相信我只爱他一个呢？？
总是爱说我和其他男生信息。。
我的心很痛。。
他知道吗？（不知）
昨晚，我哭到很夜。。
他盖我电话。。
感觉被人丢弃了。。
他说过不会丢下我一个。。
昨天他做了！
哭哭下。。
我尽然睡早了。。
他信息我//
和我说，
我们还是一个星期别信息吧！
等我考完试再找你吧。下个星期四！
我真得很怪自己。。
为什么睡早！！
如果我还没有睡。。
可能把他哄回来了。
当我看见他的信息时。。
眼泪都不受控制的流了。。
我就将去学校了。。
可能是我自己在骗自己吧。。
一回家就没事了。
他会找回我的。。
还真傻。。
在学校。。
朋友问回我怎样跟他相见的。。
我还真傻/
跟他们一起谈得好开心。。
想起我们以前怎样认识，过后吵架，暧昧，好朋友。。
还蛮傻的的。。
我的朋友都说我发傻了。。
可能是我太过分了。。
说一下很过分的话。。
搞到他很生气吧。。
我该去哄他吗？？
只个问题我一直都在问自己。。
从学校问到现在！！
道歉？？
可是他说了。。
一个星期后在信息我。。
可能他要时间冷静把。。
还是别烦他饿。。
突然很想和他说我很想他。。
回到家。。
赶快开电话。。
怎知。。
今早的信息他也没回。。
我的心很痛。。
眼泪也流了。。
陈淑谚！！
够了！！
别再哭了..
你已经哭得好几天了。。
也够了吧？？
再哭眼睛真的要肿了！！
在房里。。
一直做功课，不要让自己在想将多！！（又来骗自己了）
怎知！
手不听话。
一直要看电话。。
看他有信息我吗？？
唉！
没啦。
怎知。。
突然电话响了。。
他信息我。。
我还蛮开心的。。
怎知。。
只是问我一样东西就不复了。。
再也没信息我了。。
怎么办？/
眼泪又来了。。
忍着吧。。
说过了习惯。
就要做到吧。。
怎么办。。。
想他了。。
我可以忍到下个星系四吗？？？
我可以吗？？
眼泪又来了！
我爱他！
真的好爱他。。
希望他知道吧。


心情快回来吧。。
我不想整个星期多不开心的。。
就好乖乖的等他信息我吧。。
我会等他。。
我一定会等他。。

怎么了？/
突然感觉自己的华语了很多。。
哈哈。。
第一次想用华语来写。。
对了
陈淑谚！
笑吧！
那才像你。。
乖乖的等吧！

to jeffrey ong.

Today I caught myself smiling for no reason... then I realized I was thinking about you ...

10th grade
As I sat there in English class, I stared at the girl next to me. She was my so called "best friend". I stared at her long, silky hair, and wished she was mine. But she didn't notice me like that, and I knew it. After class, she walked up to me and asked me for the notes she had missed the day before and handed them to her. She said "thanks" and gave me a kiss on the cheek. I wanted to tell her, I want her to know that I don't want to be just friends, I love her but I'm just too shy, and I don't know why.

11th grade
The phone rang. On the other end, it was her. She was in tears, mumbling on and on about how her love had broke her heart. She asked me to come over because she didn't want to be alone, so I did. As I sat next to her on the sofa, I stared at her soft eyes, wishing she was mine. After 2 hours, one Drew Barrymore movie, and three bags of chips, she decided to go to sleep. She looked at me, said "thanks" and gave me a kiss on the cheek. I want to tell her, I want her to know that I don't want to be just friends, I love her but I'm just too shy, and I don't know why.

Senior year
The day before prom she walked to my locker. My date is sick" she said; he's not going to go well, I didn't have a date, and in 7th grade, we made a promise that if neither of us had dates, we would go together just as "best friends". So we did. Prom night, after everything was over, I was standing at her front door step. I stared at her as she smiled at me and stared at me with her crystal eyes. I want her to be mine, but she isn't think of me like that, and I know it. Then she said "I had the best time, thanks!" and gave me a kiss on the cheek. I want to tell her, I want her to know that I don't want to be just friends, I love her but I'm just too shy, and I don't know why.

Graduation Day
A day passed, then a week, then a month. Before I could blink, it was graduation day. I watched as her perfect body floated like an angel up on stage to get her diploma. I wanted her to be mine, but she didn't notice me like that, and I knew it. Before everyone went home, she came to me in her smock and hat, and cried as I hugged her. Then she lifted her head from my shoulder and said, "you're my best friend, thanks" and gave me a kiss on the cheek. I want to tell her, I want her to know that I don't want to be just friends, I love her but I'm just too shy, and I don't know why.

A Few Years Later
Now I sit in the pews of the church. That girl is getting married now. I watched her say "I do" and drive off to her new life, married to another man. I wanted her to be mine, but she didn't see me like that, and I knew it. But before she drove away, she came to me and said "you came!". She said "thanks" and kissed me on the cheek. I want to tell her, I want her to know that I don't want to be just friends, I love her but I'm just too shy, and I don't know why

.FuneralYears
passed, I looked down at the coffin of a girl who used to be my "best friend". At the service, they read a diary entry she had wrote in her high school years. This is what it read: I stare at him wishing he was mine, but he doesn't notice me like that, and I know it. I want to tell him, I want him to know that I don't want to be just friends, I love him but I'm just too shy, and I don't know why. I wish he would tell me he loved me! `I wish I did too...` I thought to my self, and I cried.